“Fuck self-image. Nobody is looking at me. Everybody is looking for me to be looking at them.”
— Travel journey entry from November 2015
You are the one laughing at yourself, the one cringing at your behavior, the one that won’t forgive yourself for stumbling your words in front of your crush – the one regretting what you said and how you behaved in front of those you cared to impress.
Nobody really cares about the Louis Vutton, the new car, the nice watch, or $700 tattoo. Nobody’s watching you. It’s just you patting yourself on the back.
Stop worrying so much about the hollow building blocks of vanity, the way you misspoke, how you look, or how that person or group of persons make you feel.
Be you, be real.
It can be a curse to not really know yourself entirely because you’ve allowed yourself to be shaped by the world around you based on assumptions of how you may be perceived for your behavior or material worth.
In the age of Social Media, it has been very easy to manipulate the self-image for public consumption. Fed by droves and droves of scrolling you see the best of one’s self, unreal realities unfolding right before your eyes. The hallmarks of minor portions of emotional bliss. Some capture for art, some for display, some to brag, some to share their journeys, but the most real of oneself lives behind the screen. The You that’s walking around bearing the emotions hidden from the social media peak hours.
The quickest way to isolate yourself from yourself is to allow others to feed to the assumption of what you think others want and then get shaped by the bullshit.
It’s easy enough now to manipulate our public persona via social media – to show the self we want others to see. To cover up the faulty edges of our broken nature. But at the end of the day, it’s just a lie. You waste and waste and waste just to be seen — but there’s nobody looking, Dear, they’re all doing the god damn same thing.
Let go. It’s not cute and it’s ruining your life.
Reconnect with the ones you love, spend more time with them, bare your emotions with loved ones NOT your followers and “friends.” Develop real relationships, lasting conversations with people you’ve built trust in and stop trying to impress everybody when it’s not in your means to do so.
You are no better than where you currently are, so quit acting like it.
Just shut the fuck up and be yourself, because really that’s what people value: authenticity — and if you’re fake, you’re just going to be surrounded by nothing but the same.
Alright, rant over — I ain’t even editing this bitch.
